Has it happened to you that instead of telling the truth you tend to make excuses or are you close to a person who makes excuses all the time and tends to blame the rest of the world or the environment for their faults?
What are excuses?
An excuse is a pretext that is used to avoid obligations or to justify any omission. It is an idea in your head or a series of stories, to avoid the pain, agitation, anxiety or fear of failure that this produces. Looking for excuses is avoiding responsibilities, not wanting to face realities, not wanting to face or “stick our chests out” in front of responsibilities.
The excuses are not only ours, they also have to do with our environment and our culture. Therefore, it is very important to create our environment, in a way that helps us meet our goals and not let excuses become the barrier that we put on ourselves.
Some of the reasons we make excuses are;
1. Do you want instant gratification? We are always looking for immediate satisfaction. Lounging on the couch is more comfortable right now than going out to exercise. Eating ice cream or the tortilla is easier than taking care of your health.
2. Do you put off what is good for you? In our culture, especially women, we tend to put ourselves in the last place of priorities. We serve everyone first and if there is some time and energy left we make room for ourselves. In other words, they have educated us to keep leftovers and perhaps it is time to change our way of thinking and our priorities. Postponing what is good for us is easy as there are usually no immediate negative consequences that others see. We will surely pay for it later, but for now, nothing bad will happen.
3. Are you afraid of failing? One of the reasons why we do not commit and make thousands of excuses is our fear of failing, of looking bad, of not meeting the expectations of others. We are afraid of not doing what we say correctly, fear of the unknown and the most important fear of not being able to finish successfully. That makes us look for excuses and want to postpone, doing something simple and safe instead or doing nothing and thus not exposing ourselves.
4. Do you leave for tomorrow what you can do today? This is a very common way of postponing and filling the space between today and tomorrow with responsibilities that have to do with others, in this way, at the end of the day we say, “I didn’t have time, it’s not my fault”.
Here are some tips that you can put into practice to eliminate excuses from your day to day:
1. The payoff is possible. It is constancy that generates the reward. Reaching the goal is possible when you start walking in that direction, however, the more excuses you give yourself, the further and the longer the road will be and there will come a time when you are going to get bored and it is easier to return to the starting point, losing all the effort you had invested.
2. Start with the goal in mind. If you can see, imagine what you want and you are going to achieve it, that is the first step, and make sure you always remember the reason why you are doing it. In this process it is very important that you can see your goal and create ways to measure your progress. Seeing you progress will help you stay motivated and remind you that you have what it takes to get there.
3. Take one step at a time. Reaching the summit implies taking a first step and the next day taking one more. If you repeat this formula every day, in less than expected you will have walked much more than imagined and surely you will arrive very soon. You will notice that step by step you will make the changes, or as our grandmothers would say “from grain to grain the chicken fills the crop”. So start now and do it every day, aim to do it for at least 60 days and you will see that it becomes a habit later on.
4. Keep a journal/ diary. Recording your progress will help you see your progress and it will motivate you to make fewer excuses and keep walking steadily without fainting. Here, in this link, you can purchase the 10 Minutes Diary that will transform your life, a tool that has helped many women achieve their goals. https://rociolifecoach.kartra.com/page/UnA151
5. Show your face. Even if the consequences are serious. You will learn to assume your responsibility and others will value you for your initiative to respond for your fouls. Nothing is more liberating than telling the truth and not having to make excuses or give explanations.
Many times it is difficult to change the mentality of living with excuses since we feel that “we do not harm anyone”, but what we really do is form a conformist community.
Remember, your excuses are your stories, so put your values into action, create an environment around you that will lead you to success and use these keys that I gave you, you will see that making your dreams come true is not as difficult as you think.
For more help, head to my website and you will find the 10 Minute Transformation Diary which will help you overcome your excuses.